Denuding the tree.

Maybe it is my ambivalence about Christmas, my strange sense of time, or having moved this year, but,  taking the ornaments off the tree seems to be more onerous than ever. Of course, with my recent Fibromyalgia diagnosis and getting used to a medication that is making me feel nauseous for most of the day could be why too.

The holiday is something I don’t know how to manage to get my head around  each year, because, I am not Christian. My childhood Christmases weren’t celebrated with religion in mind either. I feel less grounded to these traditions as the years go by, unsure that I should be celebrating without a lot of meaning or spirituality involved, but, unsure how to navigate family waters to make changes. My children love Christmas and all the trimming, just as I did when I was a girl.

I often think that if it didn’t happen every year the amazing effort and hype would have more meaning to me and feel less exhausting than it does now. To a mother of 5 children it feels like an Olympic event and like the Olympics it should occur less often.  I don’t know if this would fix my attitude, but, I wish we could try it out for a few years, just to see.

Unpacking and packing all of our Christmas clutter this year reminds me of all the sorting and re-packing I need to do in the next six months and all the packing and unpacking we did in September. It feels overwhelming this year, more than usual, and as you probably can tell, I’m not good with this task in a normal year.

Maybe next year I’ll figure out a better way to get my head in the game. Maybe I’ll experience a conversion event and fully embrace the whole Christmas deal. Or I’ll figure out a way to skip decorating and go on a cruise. Oh that reminds me, I need to check the lottery tonight.

This entry was posted on 3. January 2012 at 23:42 and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.